Traveling has a way of always bringing up the big questions in my life. Who am I? Who do I want to be? What do I value? These are just some of the ones that seem to surface during my time away from my normal habitat and responsibilities.
On this trip to Vancouver to watch the US Women’s Soccer Team compete for an Olympic bid, I’ve been thinking a lot about moderation and it’s place in my life. The concept of moderation first came up as I was meeting other fans of the team, many who follow them with far greater passion and intensity than I do. There are fans who fly all over the country to see all their games, fans who stake out coffee shops close to the team’s hotel in hopes of running into players when they go for their morning latte, fans who spend most of their time on Twitter keeping up on the hourly updates players provide. My first reaction to learning about all this was “I don’t have the time, money or patience to devote myself to such endeavors” and I thought so with a bit of arrogance- as if somehow I’m a better person for not being such a star struck fan. But then again, maybe I’m not.
Maybe I’ve spent far too much time doing several things in moderation, when I could have done a few things with extreme passion. Maybe I’ve been too scared to give my 100% to something for fear of failure and therefore have stayed on the fringes way too long. Maybe I’ve used finances, time constraints, life events, other responsibilities as excuses for not developing my passions. Maybe I’m saying maybe when all these things are true.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that being a super fan is the way I want to express my passion for life. I respect my personal life too much to invade players’ lives (even when they make it way too easy to do so). And I have no interest in devoting all of my disposal income to following them around the country. There’s too many other fun things to spend my money on! I need to find something that fits me. Something in line with my values, something I want to devote my time to achieving and I’ll be honest in needs to be something where I’m focused on myself, not on other people: I’m selfish that way. Maybe my last few days in Vancouver will shed some light on how I can move from a state of excessive moderation to moderately excessive. Maybe I’ll need to let it marinate longer. Rest assured it will materialize and when it does, you’ll be able to read all about it!